fountain water in bottles
January 31, 2020
3 mins read

Snacks of UBC: Fountain water

Snacks of UBC

Is water wet? We may never have the answer, but what we do know is that there are few things more important than keeping hydrated.

To help you get your daily dose of H2O, today we’ll be taking a look at some of UBC’s most popular water fountains—and encouraging you to be as sustainable as you can!

Nearly 500 billion plastic water bottles are bought around the world every year, and that plastic often ends up in critical ecosystems—and even our food. Bringing a reusable water bottle around with you and filling up at UBC’s water fountains can help limit your plastic use.

So, grab your Hydroflask(sksksksk) and follow us on a gourmet journey of fountain water on campus!

Wesbrook Building

(The hallway on the left upon entering)

Temperature: A couple degrees Celsius cooler than an equatorial pond. 

Velocity: Like Vancouver, it’s laid back and not in a big rush.

Taste: ...basic?

Jordan: It may not be thirst-quenching, but it is stomach-clenching.

Shawn: I could write a sonnet describing exactly how I feel about it.

Jordan: Definitely. In fact, I could think of a Shakespeare character in love with Hamlet who would just die in for this water.

Does this fountain grant you youth? 

Jordan: You’ll have to keep on searching for the elixir, unfortunately.

UBC Life Building

(upstairs by the bathrooms)

Temperature: We cool!

Velocity: Super Soaker. 

Taste: Springs in the North Shore Mountains aren’t quite jealous, but this fountain is on their radar. 

Shawn: “You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink,” they say. But you wouldn’t need to! The horse would voluntarily slurp away at this ambrosiac water! 

Jordan: If you don’t have a horse to trot home on, this is the definitive spot to fill up your bottle on the way to and from the bus loop.

Shawn: Your pet pony would like a drink too, if you can get it up the stairs. 

Does this fountain grant you youth? 

Shawn: You may not live forever, but this fountain will absolutely give you that youthful lewk.

Buchanan Building (Block A)

(Second floor, upon entering)

Temperature: Your shower after a vigorous run on a spring day. 

Velocity: Torrential.

Taste: A mix of sensations.

Jordan: Reasonably refreshing for Arts students buzzing ’bout Buchanan. 

Shawn: The Naiads from that Greek mythology class you took would love to call this fountain home—nothing better than slightly room temp water!

Jordan: It’s a practical place to fill up your water bottle while you prepare yourself to discuss the Communist Manifesto. Again. 

Does this fountain grant you youth? 

Jordan: It’ll keep you going, but you might want to start looking into cryonics instead. 

Chemistry Building (B Block)

(Ground floor)

Temperature: Gum-tingling coolness.

Velocity: Say nay to spray!

Taste: Perfect, for those wondering what free floating ions in water taste like.

Shawn: Your one-stop spot for potable water in this ancient structure!

Jordan: Definitely a safer choice to satiate your thirst than the other chemical liquids in this building.

Shawn: I might use this water to run my next simple distillation experiment and/or pH test.

Does this fountain grant you youth?

Jordan: Don’t go chasing this water fountain.

Student Recreation Centre (SRC)

(The hallways on the right, past the clothing stall)

Temperature: A Song of Ice and Fire.

Velocity: L’eau and behold, thar she blows!

Taste: Be one with the earth.

Jordan: It’s certainly got that classic UBC water fountain taste. You’re definitely getting mineral water here.

Shawn: So many minerals that even Metalbenders from The Legend of Korra can bend this water!

Jordan: Perhaps not quite invigorating as some Gatorade after your workout, but this fountain would help me hydrate after some weight-lifting. Which I definitely do.

Does this fountain grant you youth? 

Shawn: Maybe not, but it’s way better than buying a disposable plastic water bottle at the gym. 

The Verdict

Jordan: I like the fountain in Buchanan best—it may not have been the coldest, but it was certainly the most convenient!

Shawn: My inner Water-type Pokémon chooses the fountains in the Life Building. Squirtle is happy with cold water.

These fountains can get you the hydration you need to make the most of your day. So, 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, drink, 1, 2, 3, 1, 2—*gurgle*